On drawing... Again

My school schedule has been bipolar lately-- 3 days of OMG SCHOOL TIEM, then 4 days of boredom. To fill the time, I've been playing app games. This is very bad. My problem is I get involved in them to the point that I lose sight of real life. (Back when I was playing computer games, it was much much worse. I would actually forget to eat.)

But it occurred to me that instead of doing that, I could just write things here. It's actually a lot better for me. So you might be seeing a lot more of me in the future.

Anyways! I kind of want to bitch about drawing for a bit.

I am once again having trouble finding time to draw. Well, also finding motivation. All the things I want to draw are waaaaay too complicated. We're talking several-year stories, here. Plus, most of the things I want to draw are far too complicated for my skills. Seriously, I tried. It it extremely frustrating, to want to express something, but not have the skills to do so. It ends up looking really really bad. I know I shouldn't care, but I do. It's painful to look at.

What I thought of doing instead is doing autobio comics, stuff that has really happened, but real life is so BORING compared to the stories in my head! My heart just isn't in it.

What would be ideal would be taking an art class, but I just don't have the time. I'm going to be not only going to class next quarter, but also going to clinical sites as well. And I've never actually worked before, so it's probably going to kick my ass.

I guess the best thng would be to sort of draw something every day, but when I try to just sit down and draw something, it doesn't turn out well.

What might not be a bad idea is to work on drawing anatomy-- find pictures of different poses, and draw them. And also scenery... I'm really, really bad at scenery. I hate it. Of course, I could always take real backgrounds from stock photos, but that just feels like cheating.

But I've tried doing the "draw one thing a day" program, and it never works.

My problem is mainly that I don't know how to be moderate about these things. I'm either 100% into it, or 0%. 100% isn't an option, since I have school, and let's face it, I get bored. But I don't WANT to be 0% into it. My creativity needs somewhere to GO, after all, and I don't want writing to be my outlet. I want it to be drawing.

Meh, well, I'm too tired to think about it anymore. Maybe sleeping on it will help...